Postey Post Post

When you blog like I blog, you blog out like e-ver-y day. Its the TTYL era, blogin out with a gansta twist. Jibberish is my game Tulipface is my name. Get some while the gettin’s gooder and gooder and gooder and…

I’m from the Wes’ side, no, not the West Coast, the Wesleyan Church. I roll 320,000 deep. The only thing is that I haven’t been jumped in yet. You see, when your throwin up a Dubba Dub you gotta be down with a midget gansta named J-Wes. He and I don’t always agree, so I’ll stick it to the man one mo time, night time, day time, sun shinin, I blog til the break of dawn. And now for my higgety hook: Here’s who I roll wit: heavy drinkers, homosexuals, really really poor people, Subway Jarrod before he lost all that weight, transvestites, ultra liberal democrats, Baptists, hookers, people with AIDS, people who have had abortions, the doctors who perform abortions, Muslims, Shiites (too easy), Michael J. Fox, potheads, crackheads, deadheads, Right Said Fredheads, Marilyn Manson, Hussien before we killed him (Oh, like that makes up for it all, dorks), and the list keeps growin. May I mention a few more. Pedophiles, Serial Killers, Rapists. Not too many pedophile ministries poppin up, are there? If we can’t love em, I’ll see you in hell. 

Now leave me to my math work.

Bandwagoneer Jamboree

I got a wordpress blog. But I still like the Redskins though, so I can’t be completely bandwagon. Blogging is about raw creativity with very little accountablility, so here goes a special blogery doggery doozy:

Who would win in a fight?

Obama or Hillary

Osama or Rip Hamilton w/mask (both 6′7” and built like an Ethiopian Eunuch)

A Llama (spitter) or a Giraffe (typically not good fighters)

Madonna or Napoleon – Bonaparte, Dynamite, Kauffman or does it even matter, Madonna is 64 and drawing SS.

Ghandi or Andy Dick – For those of you who don’t know who Andy Dick is, he is the male Cathy Griffin.

An Ice Cream Cone or a Funnel Cake

Scott Stapp or Eddie Vedder or Chad Kroegger (tricked you, they are one in the same)

Babe Ruth with a bat or Fat Tony with a 9mm

1980’s Gary Coleman or a Pez Dispenser

Courtney Love not high on the crack rock (certainly possible) or Courtney Cox – post Friends dynasty (desperate for acceptance)

Ferris Bueller Ben Stein or Clear Eyes Ben Stein

Antonio Banderas wearing eye shadow or a really good mariachi band

Cobra Commander (no help from the troops) or Gargamel (he had a cat)

Baby Spock or Baby Shaq

Non- Mormon Shawn Bradley or Non-Flat top Mike Ditka

Duke’s B-Ball team this year or a Jar of Duke’s Mayonnaise

UNC’ s B-ball team’s graduation rate or Number of Tattoos on Iverson

#    or    *

Ralph Macchio sans headband or Anakin sans Light Saber and all that force crap.

Horse Crap (from Big Brown) or Force Crap (from 1980’s Yoda)

6′11” John Wesley or 490lb John Calvin

Teens Years Mike Tyson (pre-psycho snap) or all 6 George Foremans (armed with grills)

I don’t know you do the math.